Hmmmm
Hey where have my comments gone? I hope this never happens as a doctor, or that could be rather embarassing. i'll look at it when I get home, unfortunately without Gus, cos He's going to Invers. Hopefully it'll be up by the time he gets back- in a month!!!

|

New blog formatting (With help from Gus)
Wadda think?

|

I know it's been over a week but that's normal for me! So here's my blog, peeps...
aka the piker's blog
Thanks for the um, not so unsubtle hint Sam.
I really have nothing to comment. I'm excited about Mancamp, and am looking forward to it. That's really about it. Everything else seems to be in maintenance mode. Can't complain though. There's a lot to be joyful for.

Song: (Cos Abbey does it and she's such a trend setter!) Johnny Nash, "I can see clearly now."

|

Yah, ye made me blog
Ok so the practicalities of Running an 8-player starcraft game was slightly disturbing, an forced action of the highest cause: A new blog! Curse you all you scury buckaroos. :P

So what have been the haps?

There is a new CD in my CD player, Magnify: In wonder. They're from Wellington City Elim and I really do think they're cool. I possibly could have waited for the price to come down, but I recently got some money, and I figured that now was a good time to get it.

I have not played freecell, but have lost the final protoss level of Broodwar by 50 seconds. For those of the not-geekish ilk, you have to survive 15 minutes against swarms of enemy units. It's not easy, let me tell you. I feel a slight alteration of tactics is required.

My organisational skills are on the mend- I'm looking after my finances tonight. (As well as Scrubs and Havoc) Went to a CE planning meeting tonight. It was slightly overwhelming in that I haven't really had a lot of experience in "meetings" per se. I do feel kinda out of my depth with all these people moving the conversation back and forth. Really hard to gauge how I went or what I contributed. Wow, peoples personalities really come out at those huh? (not in any bad way, but it was interesting to see) And it was cool- and I'm looking forward to doing the work for the next one. (But oh so much detail to remember[groan]) Definitely a different type of dying to myself to be done here.

My parents and littlest Bro, Greg came down for the weekend to drop Andrew off. It was good to see them again, and just hang with them. Ok, and they brought me heaps of stuff which was also nice. But it was nice to just to have family round- different crowd, but also showing them how I spend my time, that I'm not wasting it and being really fruitful with what I have. Mum even went to Church which was cool. They're up the West Coast this week, I hope it's not raining too much!

Well, better cruise.

Oh, before i forget, record number at cell group this week! 3 people!!! Sweet!!!

|

I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell
I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell

Um, so I realized that I mihgt have a wee addiction to freecell. I've currnetly played 207 games, probably somewhere near 30 or so in the last day. So I'm taking a break. I'm not going through withdrawl symptoms or anything.

I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell

[Isn't cut and paste great ;) ]

So it's like Thursday but it feels like Monday and tomorrow's Friday, but it feels like its Tuesday- then it's Saturday and that will just bve weird cause my family will be down. Long time no see, so it will be cool. Don't know what we'll do though. Should be good none the least. This is kind of a muse so I can avoid doing this:

I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell, I shall not play Freecell

I should really do something productive. I've noticed that when I'm on holiday, I don't really catch up on anything or do anything productive. I think I'm gladto be back at work, even if it did take ages to set up that experiment today. Ah well, I got to see Scoobie Doo 2 tonight with Becs, to use up my MovieMax card- it was pretty light, I think I needed light. Then got to wathc Lion King with J and Rach (who was also playing guitar with Sam)So my current mental age is about 7, but that's all good.

Social cell was good last night, played Risk, lost both times, but survived till the end of the secondone after Sam and I basically had no countries left. I was SOOOOGOOOOD to hang out with people. I wish I could do it more often. Oh well, I guess I do have to pay the price and invite people. Kinda like playing the guitar- haven't done it in so long. Am I still willing to pay the price? I don't know. Maybe I'll have more time now that I'm no longer playing Freecell. Although Starcraft is going pretty well at the moment....

I SHALL NOT PLAY FREECELL.

Oh and Dave, where else would you take people you meet in Health Sci? Just kidding

|

I think the musings on my comments are a hint...

Ok, I get the hint, I haven't blogged in ages- even Sarah said so...

So lets go back to Sunday the 4th, and recap.

I decided to have a little "episode" about being spiritually inadequate, and lots of people commented n one little bit about this whole Christian thing being too hard. I've also had some time to think.

You're all right: J, you are right that it is pretty unlikely to give up one's entire belief system. But as the others point out, that wasn't what I was saying. Gus seemed to hit the mark, with it being an option. And yeah running away is an option, just as suicide is an option, and so is ignoring it, and talking about it in gibberish (Chewbacca!!!). It's just that most of those options seem to be less and less unlikely everyday (clap, clap) that I walk with Jesus. And Yes, it is demanding that everything I do seems to be a movement towards being like him, rather that away from him, but as J said (or implied) there is too much invested in it to throw it away. I will confess though, that ignoring it was a valid and tempting option. Just not the one that I took.

So I seemed to have survived it. I learnt heaps from the sermon that Pastor Mike preached on Sunday, and the accompanying bible study. If you're interested it was on Rom 8:28-38, and all about God's predestiny for us to be like Jesus. Now, don't restart the whole prophecy/ determinism or not. Basically it's saying that God wants to make us into perfection, and that sometimes things happen that we may not like, or be able to rationalize, but in the end it makes us who we are, and hopefully someone of worth in others eyes (aka full potential, being all you can be, being the "best Bing" I can be etc.
-cheers Scott). We are already worthy in his eyes. :)

So what else have I done- finished off the last 4 days of work up till Easter- oh my gosh it was a relief for a break- slept until 8:45 for a 9 am breakfast service opps. Actually should mention Thursday night leaders cell was cool with only Dave , Bjorn and myself, I had to share my testimony, but probably got off lightest with the other two having to be interrogated for 5 minutes each on any subject, I umm, enjoyed doing the interrogating. Drove up to Christchurch on Friday night on about 3 V's- pretty worried about falling asleep after my trip down. Dave and I went in convoy with Nic, yasmin, Nelim (sp?) and Jo. Good times. Fell for a chocolate-coated hard boiled egg @ Moeraki thanks to Justin and Becs, saw some Dolphins. Showed up 2Jo's place in Timaru to drop her off, and her Mum produced tea for us out of nothing, such a nice family. Arrived at Chch about 11- had left at 3 and taken our time, but still it was a big drive. It was nice to see Yasmin's parents again, and Dave stayed with them. I borrowed a Lilo and crashed at the Med flats in Chch. It was cool to see everybody again- we were regathering to celebrate my friend Dinesh's 21st. They had a typical Student flat, but it was a roof- and it was huge. Wandered round the market on Saturday morning- wow, it was a very cultured experience, one that really distinguished Chch from Dunedin. I got a nice painting for $10. Went shopping for Dinesh's present in the afternoon, and played some Soccer and Cricket to finish it off.
The Party was fun, catching up with old acquaintances- like Sarah, Chris, Moose, and heaps of others who I hadn't seen in ages cos They'd gone to Wellington or Chch. Went out for the first time in ages- nothing really to be excited about there. The pubs were classier than Dunedin, but just as sleazy. I'm kinda glad that I had a bit of a reaction to the smoke in one of the pubs and had to leave for bed. Noticed that most of my friends can really dance though- darn Indians! But that was all good.

Sunday, lazy Sunday. Went for a walk in the Botanical Gardens and Meet some friends from Hands on Science- Bridget, Ruth and Gav. It was good to see them again- very tired. Spent Monday with Thida- shopping at Riccarton, well, Thida shopping and Bing following- I did get some socks though! Saw a really cool Tui ad that summed up the day, "I really enjoy shopping with you; Yeah right!" Ok, so it wasn't that bad, quiet enjoyable actually. Then we drove back to Dunners in time for tea. It was a cool, but uneventful trip. Big ups to Thida and Reuben for the CD car bits, really made the trip.

And now I only really have one day of holidays left because I spent all day playing computer games. I think I'm addicted to Free cell. uh oh.
Night

PS Check this site out too. Do the puzzle entitled Thinking outside the box

|

This is gross, not for the faint of heart
I'm normally pretty strong stomached, but this even got me going "ewwwww!!!!!!"
Self-caesarian.

|

What do I call this?...

I should be really tired. I didn't get to bed until 1:30 ish last night, and now it's only 8:27, which is some what less than the (required) 8 hours or so of sleep which I would really like.

So IWT has come and gone. There are many things that I could talk about. But I'll talk about this cos it's on my mind. (As an aside I'm trying not to use "blog" as a verb. 6 months ago I don't think it was, so perhaps it can stay that way.)

I didn't really see much of the shows, I reckon I spent about half of the total time standing out the front doing the security/parking thing. Thursday was good, it all ran pretty smmothly. Missed Friday and saw the show (due to lab stuff). Worked to the bone last night. There were so many people! And the manager of the bar/restaurant was getting so irrate with all these kids trying to get into his place to buy food, running up and down the stairs and generally being a nuisance. I was kinda in the right (or wrong) place at the right/wrong time, so I spent the whole night trying to keep these kids out of the bar, and from disturbing all the private functions. Luckily I was under a veranda, so when it decided to pour, I was dry, but everybody else had the same idea, and I had to push them away into the cold and wet under orders from the manager guy, who really was ticked off- with good reason. Man, some of those kids were smart to him. I felt so sorry for him. They were hard-cases, but just out for a good time, and found the "religion" boring. I also played doctor to people who were dripping wet and freezing (but being"hard"), giving them my jacket; Finidning solutions for things like calling taxis, by lending out my phone, solving people's transport problems, by seemingly throwing my spare key around Cutting Edge, and helping this lady to her bus because she had thought she had lost it. Twice.

This isn't an attempt to blow my own trumpet. In fact I've woken up feeling the exact opposite. I know Jesus said "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all."(Mk 9:34-36). Which is what I think I've tried to do. But I woke up this morning, and on reflection went to bed last night thinking Spiritual inadequacy: Did you get to pray for anybody, or have anbody to counsel into Christ over the past three nights?. Now I know that this is crap. But still don't seem to ber able to feel that something is missing. I know how important all the behind the scene's stuff is. I know how much any event doesn't go ahead without people doing the donkey work, and I generally do it gladly. It is something that I enjoy doing, and at the same time gives me a respite from some of the more demanding areas of my life. But you know sometimes doing the "glory" stuff is cool to.

I honestly do want to celebrate all the cool stuff that's happened, because I have heard really cool stories, and got to meet some neat people. But I seem to feel so empty. I feel like I've missed something out- should I have signed up for more counselling? Should I have prayed more? Been more open to the callings of the spirit? (that's going with the gut feeling with a spiritual dimension for all you "non-church" culture people). I also know that there's been many planting of seeds from what I've been able to do. Like talking to all the kids who thought the talk about God was boring (and beyond). Serving other people, helping the lady find her bus, etc, etc, etc. But somehow it doesn't seem to feel useful/contributing, anything.

I taught on 1 Cor 12 at cell group. That's the bit with Christ being the head of one body, and all the people of the body ("Christians") having different functions, and differerent roles to play in the body, and that one can not function without the other. That we all function towards the same goal, with different roles. Of which the irony isn't lost on me, let me assure you.

I don't know where this will go from here. I reckon I should have prayed for the lady who had lost her bus- she was a spiritual mess, (we didn't talk God or anything, but she was involved with a church, and yeah needed it) and I didn't pray for her. Which was dumb, and I can offer many excuses like I was swamped and absolutely knackered, but I do not accept that that's any reason not to do it. Hopefully by God's grace I'll see her again, and take the opportunity I missed. Funnliy enough that's all I really regret, but still feel like something else is missing. Am I being given that heart for the lost? Do I need to focus on some area of my life that's previously been untouched by God? Am I crazy?

I wonder what church will hold. I guess I need to pray more and see where this is going. You know, that seems kinda funny. "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting something different" (unknown) and yet I am choosing to run to God everytime. "For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God's sight. As it is written: "He catches the wise in their craftiness"[ 3:19 Job 5:13] ; (1 Cor 3:19). I do have the choice to run away, to go, flag it-this Christian thing is too hard. Jesus demands too much and his rewards aren't enough.

I'm just glad I've learnt to run the right way.

Yours confused, but at least on a path, even if it is at the start.
Bing

|